August 15, 2023  I am stealing a few precious moments before going to bed for myself, after working pretty much all day (I just got back from “meet the new students night”).  I just picked up Eliza Croft’s book “Girls who Travel Solo.” As soon as I started reading the book, my thoughts about work… Read more

August 14, 2023 It was my first day of work today. Teacher work week.  I mentioned before that I work at a private Christian school in a city in the heart of the Bible belt.  I broke down emotionally today – more than once. Significant, emotional energy-sucking breakdowns.  The entire day was devoted to a… Read more

August 11, 2023 Before I get into more of my and James’ story, I will share what I am currently feeling.  I am currently having a breakdown. I am going to write out the pain. I feel that broken feeling inside my chest. I have that feeling of squirming in my seat and my body… Read more

August 9, 2023 I don’t really want to write a blog post where all I say is “I’m down again.” While these blog posts are for me and my healing, I also hope they can offer some sense of hope or direction for others. I hope the mess of my life can help others.  But… Read more

August 5, 2023 Today, my trip to Canada and Lake Superior ended. I am home again.  There is something about Lake Superior, being out in nature, being in a foreign country, and having new experiences that is healing.  I recently watched a video (that I can no longer find) about how, when we are struggling… Read more

August 3, 2023 The past half a year has been about overcoming challenges. Over and over again. I have felt exhausted and burned out. Many times. I have felt the afraid and insecure feeling that comes from the despair and longing. I have wanted to be out of that despair and longing, and have had… Read more

August 1st, 2023 After James confessed out loud the burdens that had kept him in chains, my happy world felt like it was disintegrating.  That week, I had several emotional breakdowns. Major ones. Due to living with my family and not wanting my mom to see what I was going through, I would drive. Aimlessly.… Read more

July 31, 2023 One night, James told me that there was something he had done, something in his past, that he had not told me. He told me that, if he were ever dating a girl and got serious enough that they were at the point of getting engaged, he would tell her – and… Read more

July 13, 2023 There are certain things that I know I need to do – certain steps I need to take in order to move on.  One of those is to remove myself from a group chat I’m still in, that includes my ex boyfriend and some of his friends, who are now also my… Read more

July 11, 2023 I feel sad. Again.  It has been over half a year since things fell apart between me and James. I keep feeling that I am doing better, and I momentarily feel glad that I seem to have moved on.  But the process of moving on is a long and gradual one. That… Read more